Should You Split the Cost of An Engagement Ring?

If you didn’t already know, I’m not particularly a big fan of weddings. Nor am I really into engagement rings. However, if you have read my post over at MakintheBacon, you will realize that I have had a change of heart. I’ve recently decided that I would like to get married and I would like an engagement ring to go along with the wedding band. Perhaps my biological clock just started ticking….

Due to the nature of both my full-time job and part-time job, I couldn’t wear a ring anyway. It’s not allowed at my full-time job because it’s a health and safety issue. I could only show it off when I went to visit friends and family. Or when I buy groceries.

It’s been several decades since DeBeers rolled out their engagement ring diamond campaign. Times have changed. Women are working now. They’re working full-time, overtime and working hard to carve a solid career.  Some women, including myself are making more than their partners. Unfortunately, the making more for me equates to working more. Sometimes, women are earning significantly more and are considered the breadwinner of the family.

Photo Courtesy of Boykung/FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

Photo Courtesy of Boykung/FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

So why is it then that the guy is almost always pressured to ask the girl to marry her? The guy has to ask her out (I saved my guy the trouble and asked HIM out), woo her, pay for the first few dates and pop the big question. Poor guys! They have to go through so much trouble and possibly rejection.

What has also changed is that many couples are moving in together before marriage. It’s quite obvious that looking for a piece of property and buying that property together is a huge commitment. Although it is not marriage, I still consider it to be quite a big step in a relationship. With that being said, you end up sharing a lot of things. You most likely share a joint account because you are sharing a mortgage and other expenses.

So since the times of changed, the order of life events have seemed to change as well. After people have been living together in a condo or house for a while, sometimes the topic of marriage comes out, which usually ends up being the next step.

If you plan on having a traditional wedding, it can end up costing at least several thousands of dollars. It’s a huge expense, thus couples will share the cost of the wedding.

Isn’t an engagement ring considered to be a huge expense? Isn’t also considered to be one of the many expenses for a wedding? So if you’re both talking about it anyway and shopping for engagement rings together, why can’t you share the cost?

If however, the engagement is a complete surprise, then disregard the last paragraph and consider it irrelevant.

I know I can come off as a total hypocrite, because my partner is buying me my engagement ring. Birthday and Christmas gifts aside, if I wanted something for myself, I would buy it with my own money that I earned. I have never asked him to buy me something that I could have easily bought myself.  I had offered to pay for half of the ring or contribute a few hundred, if the cost was a lot higher than I anticipated. I had proposed that deal on more than once occasion. Much to my surprise, that immediately got shot down.

Perhaps he didn’t want to make it seem like he couldn’t afford to get me a ring by himself? Maybe he didn’t want me to make excuses as to why we paid for a ring together?

Whether we like it or not, I think couples will be judged/critiqued to a certain extent from the moment they announce their engagement to what food is served at the reception. Everyone asks about the ring and wants to see it. People are curious to see how big the rock is. I have very small hands with thin fingers. My ring size turns out be 4 and ¾! A huge rock would actually look out-of-place and probably weigh my hand down.

Do you think it’s ok to split the cost of an engagement ring? Why or why not?

More Free Stuff for Grown Ups!

One of the best things about being a kid was that you always seemed to get a free surprise-especially when it came to food. Fast food restaurants would often, if not always provide a free toy with the kids’ meal. Over the years I collected a lot of toys from McDonald’s. Too bad I didn’t keep any of them. They’re probably collectibles now and worth a lot on eBay.

I enjoyed going to the seafood restaurants Red Lobster as a kid (and still do!) because after you finished your meal, the waiter/waitress brought out a treasure chest filled with toys for you to pick out one.

Cracker Jack and kids’ cereals have toys buried in the bottom of the box. I’m pretty sure I must have dug into the box at one point, trying to get that toy.  Don’t forget the chocolate egg with the toy inside, known as the Kinder Surprise. The extra surprise is that you have to put the toy together, which is a good way for kids to use their fine motor skills. I personally was never really into building stuff, but for some reason, it was fun to put a Kinder Surprise toy together.

 

Image Courtesy of ImageryMajestic/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image Courtesy of ImageryMajestic/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I even had a book called, “Free Stuff for Kids” where you could write to organizations and have free stuff mailed to you from them such as stickers, pencils and bookmarks. I would eagerly check the mailbox every day to see if my package of free stuff had arrived.

It’s quite obvious that being a kid is fun. Being an adult? It’s still fun, but unfortunately not as much. You have more stress, responsibilities, less sleep and bills to pay. As the saying goes, “Oh, to be young again.”

This may not amount to much, but I feel adults deserve some fun free surprises too. While we do have some free samples, such as the food ones from Costco, I feel we deserve a little more.

Whatever happened to random free samples in the mail? It could only just me, but I feel now they’re non-existent and I would have to take the time to sign up for one. When snail mail was more popular, I remember finding free samples of cereal or little packets of shampoo and conditioner in my mailbox and getting super psyched about it! I thought to myself, Wow! Free stuff that’s actually useful!

While the free snail mail stuff seems to have died down a bit, the beer companies still remember that adults like free stuff. You’ll often find a free t-shirt, hat or beer opener in the box.  The coolest free thing I’ve seen in a beer case was a small portable USB charger. Considering how much our society is obsessed/dependent on technology, it’s definitely a handy thing to have.

Even though I don’t eat the same kinds of cereals that kids do, I still eat cereal. I eat it almost every day. I haven’t really received any free stuff lately. Some cereals will ask you to mail in a couple of UPC codes in order to get something, but why can’t I relive my childhood days and get excited about finding a small surprise in the cereal box? Something light like a pack of gum? What about a pocket flashlight? Or a USB stick? You really can never have too many of those lying around.

Those items may seem pretty random, but isn’t that the whole point of the surprise? It’s unexpected and it’s random.

If it seemed to costly or too much of a hassle to include a free item in a cereal box, at least have a coupon in there to get 50 cents off the next time I purchase the cereal. Aside from kids with newspaper routes and teenagers with part-time jobs, adults are the ones with the money. Just because we make more money, doesn’t necessarily mean we want to spend more money.

Just give me something! Ideally, for free. 😛

What the coolest free thing you received? Should there be more free stuff found in products for adults?

Going Paperless to Save Costs

As much as I like receiving snail mail that is not junk or a bill, if there is an option to go paperless and receive the notification via email, I am all for it.

Nowadays more and more people are using E-Vite to spread the news of their event. People can receive their bills and pay stubs as a PDF attachment and print them out whenever necessary. I hate clutter and having a lot of stuff. At first a few sheets of paper doesn’t seem like a lot and doesn’t seem to take up space, but then before you know it, you have hundreds of sheets of paper in piles all over the place. They end up cluttering every spare inch of flat surface.

paperless saves money

Every so often I go on a paper purge and sort through all my loose papers. I find it just as satisfying as doing a physical purge of stuff.  However, I wouldn’t have to do it as often if every company and organization went paperless. I do understand the importance of having hard copies of certain documents, but I don’t think it’s absolutely necessary for everything to be printed out.

A small, yet significant piece of paper that seems to clutter my wallet here and there is the receipt. Grocery receipts are often the worse because they tend to have the most items on them, thus they tend to be longest piece of paper in my wallet. It has to be folded several times over in order to fit in my wallet. Most of the time, I ended up just stuffing it in my wallet.

Although I make most of my purchases using a credit card so I can track the amount spent, I still like being able to have a copy of the receipt in case I have been overcharged for items or didn’t receive a discount I was entitled to. The credit card only shows the total amount of your purchase, not every single item that was purchased at that time, which is why a receipt is always good to keep for a period of time.

How many times have you ended up losing a receipt or throwing out a receipt by accident, but ended up needing it to make a return? Throwing out a receipt can be automatic for some of us. I am no stranger to throwing out a receipt that was needed. As disgusting as this may seem, there have been a few rare occasions where I have dug into one of the trash baskets in the house to retrieve the receipt. It was usually the office trash basket though, rather than the kitchen or bathroom one.

Prior to my trip to Greece, I had done a bit of clothes shopping to have something decent to wear. When the salesperson had finished ringing up my purchases, she asked whether or not I wanted my receipt printed out or have it emailed to me.  Without even really thinking about it, I automatically said I wanted a hard copy, but was quite intrigued by the idea of having it emailed to me. I had never heard of such of thing and made a note to myself to choose the email option next time I shopped at that store.

This was the first store that has ever asked me that option and in this digital age, I’m surprised that more stores haven’t followed suit. We often tap our credit cards and debit cards to make payments, or sign on the electronic screen. They often ask us if we want to sign up for their e-mail newsletter, so people have given their email addresses from time to time.

If you’ve ever worked the cash register at retail, you are all too familiar with the annoyance of running out of receipt paper, telling the customer to wait and putting the roll of paper back into the register. Mind you, it doesn’t take THAT long and doesn’t happen too often because the receipt rolls are quite large, but it’s still an annoyance when it does happen, nonetheless.

Providing the option of emailing receipts would mean stores wouldn’t have to spend money on receipt rolls (I have no idea how much they cost) and of course, it would be better for the environment. Unless the email was deleted, the receipt wouldn’t be lost. You would be able to keep a ton of receipts on file and not get annoyed by all those paper receipts stuffed in your wallet.

Looking at my email receipt would be a lot easier than digging into my wallet for that crumpled piece of paper.

Do you like the idea of having a hard copy of the receipt or would you prefer to have the receipt emailed to you? Do you hate it when your wallet is stuffed with paper receipts?